Camel Toe Anyone?!!?!

OK first of all, If you have a beef curtain issue don't wear tight clothing. Secondly buy this worthless product.

Important Information

Indications
The Cuchini is used to prevent and eliminate what is commonly known as Camel Toe. Camel toe is a very common wardrobe challenge for women and occurs as a result of wearing tight fitting clothing such as fitness apparel, pants, shorts or swimwear. The snugness of the fabric may result in the outline of the female anatomy taking on the unsightly appearance of the forefoot of a camel, thus the name, camel toe.

Directions
Place the Cuchini Pad into bikini, lingerie, yoga pants, sports attire, jeans, or any form fitting clothing, with the narrow side facing down & back with the smooth side against your clothing, adjust to personal preference. For secure placement, doubled sided fashion tape is included. Gently hand-wash the Cuchini with mild detergent and allow to air dry before use. You may also machine wash the Cuchini in a lingerie bag with light colored clothing on gentle cycle and allow to air dry before use. For additional solutions to your most embarrassing fashion problems, please visit us at www.cuchini.com

So at least now I am well informed of WHY a camel toe happens and what it looks like.



Here's the other reviews.

 Works Great!, April 6, 2013

By 

Michelle

This review is from: Cuchini Camel Toe Pad (Misc.)

First of all, let me start by saying my area "down there" is vast and deep; a veritable black hole. Some of my friends used to call me CHIME as my beef curtains blow in the wind- not any more!! If I install 2 Cachini pads (the first one usually gets slimey then dissapears) I never have to worry now about small objects being lost. The only 2 drawbacks are that I get less attention when I wear my bathing suit & skinny jeans, and I had to buy a stamp sponge (I work in a mailroom and without the Cuchini blocking device I had plenty of moistiness for the stamps).

 He wanted to be a father..., April 8, 2013

By 

Ethan L Butler

This review is from: Cuchini Camel Toe Pad (Misc.)

A friend's wife purchased the Cuchini Camel Toe Pad (Misc.) and asked him to apply it for her. I guess he should have read the directions. Don't let the same thing that happened to him happen to you. All I can tell you is that the adhesive side goes on the swimsuit - not the person. He wanted to be a father, but now everything is sealed shut, and that sucker is never coming off.

2.0 out of 5 stars Wasn't for Men. Deceptive packaging, April 10, 2013

By 

Justin quattlebaum (Cabot, AR, US) - See all my reviews

This review is from: Cuchini Camel Toe Pad (Misc.)

Fist off I really didn't get the camel toe issue. I should have googled it before buying the pads. I have a rather heavy sac , and I wanted something that would hide the fact that I have softball nutz. I applied the Cuchini on my Fruit of the Looms, pulled em up, and my bag compressed and shot both my lug nuts outside the left and right side of the Cuchini. I looked like I had a warped,Van Gogh-ish Micky Mouse head thing going on in my pants. Very uncomfortable. I would not recommend this to other men.


You did what? OMG this is crazy.. The best for last!

5.0 out of 5 stars Cuchini Disappearance, April 6, 2013

By 

T. C. Toop "Candace" (Boise, ID) - See all my reviews
(REAL NAME)   

This review is from: Cuchini Camel Toe Pad (Misc.)

I tried the Cuchini, and while my camel toe was completely hidden when I left the house, I later found that it was gone. I couldn't find it anywhere and I just assumed that it had fallen out of my pant leg, but about a week later I reached down and found something falling out of my gaping vagina. Well, it was the Cuchini. I pulled that sucker out and man, the smell!!! It smelled like a rotting catfish on a sunny Tennessee day. Well, needless to say, I was disappointed in the product. I tried to return it, but customer service says they can't take it back and to just throw it away. I was appalled that I wasn't able to get my money back!!!

Hutzler Banana Slicer

“Needless to say, I was asked to leave by a clerk who gave me a knowing look and muttered "banana slicer got another one" as he ushered me out the door. ”Rashelle Jones  |  310 reviewers made a similar statement

“I gave this product only one star because I wish the instructions were a little morecomprehensive. ”Monkey man  |  247 reviewers made a similar statement

“A few weeks later for mother's day, my husband bought me the best gift ever...a 571 B BananaSlicer. ”Jessica Cardwell  |  121 reviewers made a similar statement

Most Helpful Customer Reviews

43,134 of 43,563 people found the following review helpful

5.0 out of 5 stars No more winning for you, Mr. Banana! March 3, 2011

By SW3K

For decades I have been trying to come up with an ideal way to slice a banana. "Use a knife!" they say. Well...my parole officer won't allow me to be around knives. "Shoot it with a gun!" Background check...HELLO! I had to resort to carefully attempt to slice those bananas with my bare hands. 99.9% of the time, I would get so frustrated that I just ended up squishing the fruit in my hands and throwing it against the wall in anger. Then, after a fit of banana-induced rage, my parole officer introduced me to this kitchen marvel and my life was changed. No longer consumed by seething anger and animosity towards thick-skinned yellow fruit, I was able to concentrate on my love of theatre and am writing a musical play about two lovers from rival gangs that just try to make it in the world. I think I'll call it South Side Story.

Banana slicer...thanks to you, I see greatness on the horizon.

841 of 913 people found the following review helpful

 The Hutzler Banana Slicer has made my working life hell!, October 7, 2012

I live and work in Queensland Australia and as many of you will know, this is where bananas get bent. My career as a banana bender began when I first left school and thanks to my excellent banana bending technique, I have risen through the ranks to achieve the highest possible level of Chief Banana Bender Extraordinair.

In my work I now have over 800 banana benders beneath me and even though this seems like a lot to manage, my job has always been pretty easy..... until now! :(

The Hutzler Banana Slicer has made my working life hell !! Thanks to it's fixed banana bend our work practices have had to change considerably. The problem is that every man's banana bend is different. In fact, I will go as far to say that no two men's bananas are bent the same. I can say this with confidence, as we have monthly inspections where all 800+ men have their bananas closely scrutinised.

But now sadly, we are forced to conform with some arbitrary banana bend, created without consideration for the vast variation in the bend of a man's banana.

I hate you Hutzler Banana Slicer! You have made my working life hell. You are responsible for much grief and ultimately you will be responsible for the loss of many a banana bender's job, as you leave us with no option but to move towards electronic banana bending.

14,722 of 15,117 people found the following review helpful

5.0 out of 5 stars GREAT Gift August 3, 2012

By Uncle Pookie

Once I figured out I had to peel the banana before using - it works much better.
Ordering one for my nephew who's in the air force in California. He's been using an old slinky to slice his banana's. He should really enjoy this product!

2,753 of 2,925 people found the following review helpful

1.0 out of 5 stars Confusing, September 11, 2012

By 

Q-Tip - See all my reviews

There is no way to tell if this is a standard or metric banana slicer. Additional markings on it would help greatly.

2,538 of 2,750 people found the following review helpful

5.0 out of 5 stars Such a time saver, September 24, 2012

By 

lloydravn - See all my reviews

No more throwing bananas at the ceiling fan for me! This product has saved me the work of peeling the banana slices off the wall after the fan slices them. Thanks, banana slicer!

714 of 773 people found the following review helpful

1.0 out of 5 stars This product ruined my marriage., August 29, 2012

By 

Doubtful Divorcee - See all my reviews

I met my husband years ago on a blind date at a tropical fruit convention. We instantly hit it off and he soon fell in love with my banana slicing skills, and we were quickly married. Every morning there were perfectly sliced bananas to top his waffles, his cereal, even as garnishes for his eggs. That's why he loved me. My perfectly sliced bananas. We were in wedded bliss. But I was a fraud, I had been using this banana slicer instead of cutting up his bananas perfectly with a knife. Before he woke up I would sneak downstairs and use the Victorio 571B on the bananas, put them on a cutting board, and place a knife next to them and quickly hide the slicer. I loved how he would praise my banana slicing skills to everyone, anytime, even during our romantic embraces.

One morning I came into the kitchen and he was already there, holding the slicer. He asked how long I had been faking my slicing skills, and told
me I had betrayed him, our marriage, and everything that our relationship was based on. He called a divorce attorney that morning, and now I am alone and working three jobs to make ends meet.

A word of advice: please disclose your use of this product to your loved ones to avoid problems like this in the future. It WILL destroy your life!

Fifty Shades of Grey...

I really don't have much to say on this, I did read the books and my opinion is crossed.  I liked it but I didn't, there could have been much more added to it. Then again it was very "vanilla" compared to the real world. So on that note lets see what others reviews are on this subject.

“Once I started reading it I couldn't put it down and immediately after I finished I HAD to purchase the next book!! ”h1234  |  2,748 reviewers made a similar statement

“The sex scenes are boring, repetitive and even awkward at times. ”J. Stein  |  3,496 reviewers made a similar statement

“I really wanted to like this book but, sadly, it was just not meant to be. ”M. Anderson  |  1,661 reviewers made a similar statement

20,656 of 21,407 people found the following review helpful

2.0 out of 5 stars Did a teenager write this??? April 15, 2012

By meymoon TOP 50 REVIEWER

Format:Paperback|Amazon Verified Purchase

I really don't like writing bad reviews. I admire people who have the courage to put pen to paper and expose themselves to the whole world, especially those writing erotica. Having just finished this book, however, I feel compelled to write a review.

About half way through the book, I looked up the author to see if she was a teenager. I really did because the characters are out of a 16 year old's fantasy. The main male character is a billionaire (not a millionaire but a billionaire) who speaks fluent French, is basically a concert level pianist, is a fully trained pilot, is athletic, drop dead gorgeous, tall, built perfectly with an enormous penis, and the best lover on the planet. In addition, he's not only self made but is using his money to combat world hunger. Oh yeah, and all of this at the ripe old age of 26! And on top of that, he's never working. Every second is spent having sex or texting and emailing the female character. His billions seem to have just come about by magic. It seriously feels like 2 teenage girls got together and decided to create their "dream man" and came up with Christian Grey.

Then come the sex scenes. The first one is tolerable but as she goes on, they become so unbelievable that it becomes more laughable than erotic. She orgasms at the drop of a hat. He says her name and she orgasms. He simply touches her and she orgasms. It seems that she's climaxing on every page.

Then there's the writing. If you take out the parts where the female character is blushing or chewing her lips, the book will be down to about 50 pages. Almost on every single page, there is a whole section devoted to her blushing, chewing her lips or wondering "Jeez" about something or another. Then there's the use of "shades of". He's "fifty shades of @#$%% up," "she turned 7 shades of crimson," "he's ten shades of x,y, and z." Seriously?

The writing is just not up to par, the characters are unbelievable, and the sex verges on the comical. I don't know what happens in the remaining books and I do not intend to read them to find out. But given the maturity level of the first book, I imagine that they get married, have 2 perfect children, cure world hunger, and live happily ever after while riding into the sunset, as the female character climaxes on her horse causing her to chew her bottom lip and blush fifty shades of crimson. Jeez!

And here comes the Twilight reference...

4,992 of 5,246 people found the following review helpful

1.0 out of 5 stars Not the worst I've ever read... No, wait. It IS. March 6, 2012

By Ebeth822

Format:Kindle Edition|Amazon Verified Purchase

I downloaded the book to my Kindle because it was on the best seller list and had 4 stars overall rating on Amazon. I wish I'd taken the time to read some of the reviews. As it turns out I agree with the negative.
I found myself thinking "Twilight, plus some spanking, minus the sparkly vampires." Here, I'll save you all some time (SPOILER ALERT):

Once upon a time...
I'm Ana. I'm clumsy and naive. I like books. I dig this guy. He couldn't possibly like me. He's rich. I wonder if he's gay? His eyes are gray. Super gray. Intensely gray. Intense AND gray. Serious and gray. Super gray. Dark and gray. [insert 100+ other ways to say "gray eyes" here]
I blush. I gasp. He touches me "down there." I gasp again. He gasps. We both gasp. I blush some more. I gasp some more. I refer to my genitals as "down there" a few more times. I blush some more. Sorry, I mean I "flush" some more. I bite my lip. He gasps a lot more. More gasping. More blushing/flushing. More lip biting. Still more gasping.
The end.

The bad:
It was an interesting concept - for a "romance" novel. However the story is weak, the pace is slow and awkward, the characters come through as more schizophrenic than complicated, the "romance" is a jeuvenile and dysfunctional crush, and the "erotic" scenes alternate between "Penthouse Forum" and something that sounds like it was written by a painfully shy and sheltered 13 year old. I have now read through some of the rave reviews and I have to assume that these were posted by people easily shocked and/or titillated. I can't imagine what fans are comparing this to when they describe this as "good."

The good:
Nice cover art.

There is a lot to cover here. I will add more later.

Butter Spreader...umm

So my question is why do I need a butter spreader? To spread butter on my corn, how about lube on my husbands penis. Well let this one explain it.

This is why you need a butter spreader. FAIL!

Good Cook Classic Apple Wedger.

I love reading the reviews on Amazon. You must try this! Look up your favorite product and wham! Someone has something to say about it.